How do you deal with a 10 year old school thug?
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Reading an article today I was appalled that a 10 year old boy has been arrested over the alleged attack of two woman teachers in their fifties. One has suffered a broken leg and also a suspected dislocated kneecap. The other teacher has facial injuries. What on earth will he be like when he becomes a teenager and is there any hope for him to ever change?
Responses (8)
Post his picture and profile on sites popular with paedophiles then act saddened at the state of the UK's social fabric when he vanishes :)
I'm sorry but the child, like the teachers, are victims of a situation where little or no respect has been shown to him throughout his short life.
He witnesses with his own eyes that there are no consequences to unacceptable behaviour and possibly has learned a great deal of his behaviour from significant adults in his life.
His lifesyle is determined by irresponsible adults, who believe that no rules or regulations should apply and that aggression makes you strong and prevents you from becoming a victim in life. He respects nothing and no one but his own on-going daily survival.
Authority is something to be viewed with suspicion and anyone who attempts to control his life through discipline or boundaries is the enemy.
His childhood has been cut short and his brain and socialisation has been damaged but not beyond help.
He and those in his life have to accept responsibility and recognise that there are consequences to his actions. For his own longterm development and welfare he has to be removed from the negativity that is shaping his young life and assessed in terms of emotional, psychological and chemical imbalances.
He won't be named for legal reasons and he is under the age of criminal responsibility, so any form of rehabilitation will be a series of making the child jump through a series of 'hoops' that enables certain professionals to tick boxes and tick the final box - job done! Will this result in a qualatative change in his behaviour? Perhaps. Longterm? Not if the external influences that have shaped whom he is today remain unchallenged and unchanged.
Absolutely right Parchester, it's sad that he has had such influences in his life, and needs all the help he can get to try and mould him into a reasonable human being. It does seem to me that a number of people have failed him, not just his parents. His behaviour must've been questioned by the school before now, but there's no funding available to support children like this until something serious happens.
And the same with the parents......?
Just dock him a finger whenever he misbehaves, and if he misbehaves more than ten times, move onto the toes ;-)
In some cases perhaps children are 'influenced' into becoming thugs/rapists, etc., however I believe that some people are just born 'bad' and no amount of good upbringing, good influence and education can or will ever change them. Even a 10 year old has a conscience and has the wherewithall to either do right or wrong (thinking about the 2 evil s***s that tortured Jamie Bulger). I do not believe that external influences are ever wholly to blame for the sheer evil some children/teens/adults carry out - even though this is undoubtedly not the 'modern pc' stance where it seems that rehabilitation and education etc are purported to be the answer to all........ if that stance really did work we we would all be able to walk the streets safely at night.
Well said Wendi. I do feel, like you, that some children are born to be bad as awful as that sounds. I remember some of the children at nursery school when mine were small always biting, hitting and punching. Mine came away many times with teeth marks and scars to their faces. I remember a friend who had adopted a little girl of 2/3 and she had a terrible temper and bit loads of the children. Her mother used to say "I wonder what her parents' were like". I know she smacked her and even bit her back but nothing she did was ever any good and she grew up to be a very mean and nasty person.
Placing this in some perspective and by no means excusing his behaviour and the violence attached to it but the school that he attends is for those with special educational needs.
So he has already been assessed as being of special needs and requires specialist intervention in his life.
Clearly from the hurt he has caused other's it seems that this isn't the right educational environment for him. The attack took place two days after he returned to school from the Christmas/New Year break and so he may well have heightend emotional issues that resulted in this outburst.
Until three year's ago we had an autistic boy living nearby. He needed twenty-four hour care and was often sent home from school as they couldn't cope with him and his terrible tantrums. This was a special needs school too. He did some terrible things like bit his mother so deeply that she was bruised black from the top of her arm to her wrist. He thumped her (bearing in mind also that he grew to be six feet tall with a good sized frame). He tried to burn the house down. He had to be locked in all the time and locked out of some of the rooms in the house in case he hurt himself. He jumped on the floorboards until they broke. There were deep holes in the walls where he had pelted and heaved objects at. If there was any paint left for as little as five seconds he would be in it and pour it down the toilet, into the bath, and then over the floors and also tramp it through the house and cover himself with it. Many times he would lay down in the street and nothing would get him up again. Often he would run away if he got out and the helicopters and police had to look for him. The damage was endless but his Mum who did everything humanly possible to look after him, hardly got any help whatsoever. I must say she was one of the most courages women I have ever met. I don't think I could have done it. This young man as he is now of 22 year's of age will have to be looked after constantly for the rest of his life.
It is surprising what the human psyche IS able to deal with when life deals you a difficult hand.
Our coping mechanisms are greater than we perceive them to be.
I am certain that those times in your life, when everything just seems too too much to bear and your heart, and physically even, is at breaking point and yet you cope and brilliantly too.
I have known many parents confront some of life's heartaches involving their children with such compassion, strength, understanding and grace. The love for a child does appear to be unconditional, in some people, not all, and sadly my past work has required me to pick up those lives damaged on so many dfferent levels all because of irresponsible parents.
We often hear of the horror stories because they sell newspapers but for each of those there are hundreds more inspirational amazing stories that are never heard or read about in your newspapers. I wonder why?
Sabre, its very sad but true that a lot of people don't get the help they need (but conversely some with milder conditions milk the system for all they can get). I take my hat off to any mother who deals with severe autism, I really do.
Parchester, you are so right about how strong some people can be, some are determined to survive whereas others seem to give in at the first hurdle and need nurturing to get through. I have seen some parents deal fantastically with children who do not fit the social norm, doing everything possible to enrich their lives, and others who have treated the child as an inconvenience and found it so difficult to cope that social services have had to become involved.
It's very sad that a child has been brought up in such a way that at only ten he attacks two teachers and hospitalises them. I just hope that in the future he does get the help he desperately needs to prevent this ever happening again and that he has anger management and hopefully the help of his parents to sort him out.
Some years ago, I was surrounded by a group of kids, probably all about ten, from local 'traveller' sites and homes and I have to say how scary that was. I was making official calls at the time and the only safe way to retreat was to share some banter with them and leave the scene. I may not have suffered at that time but my car would have.
I can only imagine that the mindless violence that came from this kid was a sad reflection of what he has seen or been used to at home and as such is learned behaviour and very much reminiscent of an animal rather than a civilised young boy. I guess if you treat a child as an animal, he's going to act like one. The worry here is that the parents and their parental control are the all important link and possibly answer to this violent behaviour but it sounds like they may be a sad reflection of their offspring ... so what hope do we have here? This was not a simple case of a ten year old reacting badly to school discipline, it was a mindless little thug playing out what has gone before and therefore seemingly the way to go. This boy will need the attention of the authorities for some time to come ... remember Jamie Bulger and the two ten year old boys who abducted, tortured and eventually killed him?
What a sad reflection on society when even a ten year old can make us all shudder.
It is Snoops, but if Parchester's right and he was at a school for special educational needs, presumably they were aware that he was prone to violent outbursts and should have had team teach trained members of staff to hand? Too often teachers who work in that environment are left unsupported, and it takes something awful like this for the authorities to look again at the cuts they are making.
As that's the case then Jazz, I wonder how effective the 'arrest' will be of a ten year old boy who has special needs? No doubt there'll be some defence that he was unaware of his actions. The interesting thing here is does he have special educational needs because it was generic or is it as a result of parental mishandling? So many questions ....
And that's the million dollar question Snoops! So often we are told so and so has this disorder or that disorder, but even the experts are divided on whether some exist
The child need to be disciplined and discipline begins at home.
it should CS, I don't disagree, but quite otten it doesn't and the child is brought up by the electric babysitter in the corner of the room. So many start primary school without knowing colours or being able to count to 5, let alone understanding the concept of sharing, taking turns, or sitting down to eat!
Personally if it was one of my relatives I would wait for a dark night and kick the living s*** out of him and scare him so badly he wouldnt even look at an adult the wrong way again.
Bring back conscription its the only way to teach these mindless little thugs.
I hate to say it but violence is the only thing they understand but we keep trying to namby pamby them liberal style - I've seen it too many times there is no non-aggressive solution.
Why do you think we have the problem we have now - precisely because there is no deterrent in school - ie the belt or cane.
Parents are not allowed to hits their kids.
We cant arrest and imprison anyone under age they know it and play on it.
Old style tactics are the best tried and tested - put em in the army send them out to Afghanistan for a few months and they will learn quickly the value of life!
Much as I hate to say it computer games, television , antics of footballers and other so called role models are much to blame as is rap music and the violent gang (cool) scene imported from America.
I've got a Polish friend and a Russian friend, and both think British kids get away with murder (sometimes literally).
My Polish friend said if kids did over there what they do here, adults would beat some sense and respect into them.
When asked what would happen in Russia, my Russian friend said (in a really thick Russian accent, just like the movies)...
"Police would beat them up. Police then beat up adults beating up kids. Police beat everyone up. Is Russia!"
Which was topped moments later when we asked what really happens to obnoxious kids in Russia and he replied:
"We feed them to bears. Is Russia!"
Yip having been in every Eastern European country I can vouch for that - the discipline is hard and hence there is very little mis-behaviour - even dropping litter in my fave town in Slovakia is a nono! People look at you like you have two heads!
Also I would add that the single mother society we have has also contributed greatly - you need a man in the house to instill discipline regardless of what any woman may say! Women just dont have the authority especially with boys although I am reliably informed girls are worse.
Have to disagree with you OD. I brought my two children up from the ages of 11 and 12 because my husband died and have to say they are two of the most polite and super people you could wish to know.
Obviously, you have met up with the ones who have been brought up by a Mum only and find this different to my statement but I can only speak personally about my own two lovely children (adults now of course).
Well thanks OD, I do my best and my four children are all doing very well at school, the oldest aiming for Cambridge next year, and the others achieving equally good grades. Even when married I found the discipline was always left to me!
Obviously there are exceptions to every rule - I am talking about the usual council high rise slappers who sleep with anything to get a council house not quality ladies such as yourselves.
Cheers Od, I'm a long way from that category I can assure you!
Thank you OD I see where you are coming from now. I worked long hours at that time for a Doctor but my children were always looked after at home and never had their own keys as there was a welcome Grandma waiting to give them their tea and love. This enable me to give them a good education for the future.
WISH I KNEW ?
So far so good Sabre?
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Sounds like the ideal answer ... nothing I can add to your excellent suggestion.
Oh heck that's harsh!!
A sad indictment of the UK's social fabric indeed...
Brilliant!!!
And the sad thing is... as tongue-in-cheek as it sounds, you could then turn out all the psychopaths to hunt down the paedophiles... and then when we're overrun by psychopaths, gather them all up in an arena and let them rip each other apart, gladiator-style. End of problem.
If only all the hand-wringing liberals and do-gooders weren't in the way, telling us that every criminal is a victim. Criminals do what they do because they know they can get away with it and their role models have shown them that it's acceptable.
Even more brilliant!
Top that one G-Man!
Tch, OD...
I refer my honoured colleague to a previous discussion...
https://my.money.co.uk/discuss/discussion-details.htm#id=752
Great minds agree on the gladiatorial arena :)
Oh yes, G-Man, I clearly remember that interesting piece of gladiatorial thinking! :-)