Why do some people get married

by , 4 months ago

After reading in the paper about various celebrities being married for very short times i.e. Sinead O'Conner splits from husband after 16 days and Kim Kardashian after 72 days why on earth would they go to all that expense to get married if it was doomed in the first place.

Responses (13)

Well with celebrities of course, their needs are tempered by the demands of their lifestyles, which can never be 'normal' as we would know it. I can only assume that such pressures destroy the fabric of such marriages from the start, although admittedly many showbiz marriages go on for years. There's also the possibility that rapidly broken celebrity marriages make headline news by default whereas those that happen to normal people never quite make the press.

My other thought is that celebrities' decision to get married is bound by their glitz and glamour lifestyle and hence simple needs like companionship and togetherness simply never enter into it, leading to early breakdown in the relationship. Perhaps 'needing each other' is an unknown quantity especially when the celebrity lifestyle demands competitiveness in themselves as unique individuals. And again perhaps after the honeymoon period, they have lost any need to share their lives and stay together.

by Snoopy48, 4 months ago

As I have said before in a different discussion don't be fooled by the never-ending showmances that keep churning up.
Sinead O'Connor must have been really desperate to hit the headlines with this non-sensical supposed union. Or just maybe she is trying to re-release her old cover of a great song by Prince which ironically begin with the great lyrics "It's been 7 hours and 16 days".

by creativesaver, 4 months ago

I'm equally cynical CS, suspect at least some are just headline chasing

by Jazzj, 4 months ago

I don't pretend to understand this, Sabre.

I'm obviously not the world's best authority on marriage, as Mr F is No 3, but I can honestly say I only ever married for love - it just didn't work out until this time!

by Feline123, 4 months ago

Three times?? Glutton for punishment feline, can't see me ever doing it again!

by Jazzj, 4 months ago

Never say never Jazzj I've done it twice with no regrets at all - they both have made me very very happy with wonderful memories of what we shared and still sharing.

by Sabre, 4 months ago

Early days yet Sabre but can't imagine ever finding anyone special enough to tempt me again!

by Jazzj, 4 months ago

Gosh Feline finding love three times! Lucky you. One marriage is enough for me i think... How do you ever get over the last and then do it again and again... Must be so emotional...

by serena1, 4 months ago

I'm with you on that Serena, can't imagine ever doing it again!

by Jazzj, 4 months ago

Time is a great healer and usually it happens that you meet and fall in love with that special person when you are least expecting it; I did. On our second date he asked me to marry him and that was nearly 19 year's ago. We have had this subject before so that's all I'll say on the subject.

by Sabre, 4 months ago

Been lucky this time but I'd never ever do it again!

by Feline123, 4 months ago

I do love hearing all the romantic stories it just dosen't happen to me!!!

by serena1, 4 months ago

3 times Feline you must like cake.lol

by Noddy1, 1 month ago

Cake, Noddy....?

by Feline123, 1 month ago

Because they are human beings like the rest of us and they make mistakes.

by fruitcake, 4 months ago

Yes I suppose they do fruity I was thinking of all the arrangements and expense as well as the disappointment and the aftermath of it all. Such a shame for them.

by Sabre, 4 months ago

I guess that would be the same for the rest of us too though. But I must say I feel sorry for 'celebrities' having to deal with it all in the glare of publicity, the price they pay for being in the public eye I guess.

by fruitcake, 4 months ago

It must be horrible when everyone knows what has happened and as you say especially when they are in the public eye.

by Sabre, 4 months ago

I suspect that people craving the limelight, like Sinead O' Connor, whom placed an ad on the internet and met and married this man without ever really KNOWING him decided that this approach would ensure that she achieved some noterity and thus, once again, generate some column inches.

Even she described the whole situation as a 'bit of a wild ride' blaming the breakdown on the behaviour and attitude of her husbands family and friends. This being her fourth marriage it appears that O'Connor is blameless for the marriage breakdowns. Perhaps she needs to face up to the understanding that it takes two to make a marriage and that if the bond of love and understanding is strong enough it will overcome much.

I wouldn't be at all surprised if she was making a mockery of the institution of marriage and in doing so courting media attention having not had a hit or real talent based fame since 'Nothing Compares 2 U' in 1990.

Instead of marriage Ms O'Connor why not go onto some reality based celebrity programme like, 'Strictly Come Dancing' 'Dancing On Ice' 'I'm A Celebrity..' or perhaps more in keeping with your Z list status, Channel 5's 'Celebrity Big Brother'.

Just a thought!

by Parchester, 4 months ago

Surely people (and not just 'celebrities') can marry someone they know really well and the marriage can still go wrong?

by fruitcake, 4 months ago

In no way are my comments related to or a commentary on marriage per se but specifically on what is in the public domain regarding Sinead O'Connor's shortlived 4th marriage.

But you raise an interesting point.

Does marriage change a person's mindset and this alters the personal dynamics that exist between the two people both positively and negatively?

by Parchester, 4 months ago

I've not really followed Sinead O'Conner but i do remember the one hit! If i had 4 failed marriages i would really have to take a long look at myself and wonder where the heck its all going wrong.... The poor girl wants or needs something and whatever reason not getting it in the marriages and she'll keep trying hope she finds it eventually!!

by serena1, 4 months ago

It's such a shame when a marriage fails. Being divorced myself i do feel it is a shame but i'm happier being single at the moment wouldn't like to be in a miserable marriage and counting the years without truly being happy from within.

The thought of getting married again terrifies me i don't know why but i don't think i can...

It would be nice to meet a guy for company and do things with i.e nice meal, theatre, weekends away etc but i'm so set in my ways i don't think i could live with one...

These days so many couples don't get married which is also a shame i think everyone should do it at least once hopefully it can last an anniversary or two!!! Lol

by serena1, 4 months ago

I feel like I've just got out of prison, am really enjoying making my own decisions without someone looking on disapprovingly! Once I get the finances sorted I'll be soooooo much happier than when I was married. Finding the strength to leave an unhappy marriage is a good example for the children, staying in a miserable one sets the wrong example I think

by Jazzj, 4 months ago

You are so right, Jazzj!

by Feline123, 4 months ago

Publicity

by Noddy1, 4 months ago

Tonight it has been reported that celebrities Russell Brand and Katy Perry are to divorce after a year of marriage.

Wow! A whole year!! That must have been love!!!

by Parchester, 4 months ago

A year's a long time in showbusiness as they say, being cynical I haven't noticed either of them in the public eye lately, but this should raise their profile again

by Jazzj, 4 months ago

How truly cynical of you Jazzj!!

It seems that the perenial story of 'A Star Is Born' is at work here. One young star (Perry) is on the crest of a successful wave, whilst her aging husband's (Brand) career seems to be on the wane after some disastorous career choices!!

Cue another remake?!!

by Parchester, 4 months ago

Wahoo!

Time for me to hop on a plane and go offer Katy a shoulder (and other body parts) to cry (or lie) on :)

by G-Man, 4 months ago

G-Man, you're incorrigible...but you do have good taste...Katy's lovely! :-)

by fruitcake, 4 months ago

Heh, and she has substantial assets :)

Quite well off too... Even after the divorce she'll have at least 30 million :)

by G-Man, 4 months ago

Russel Brand and Ksty Perry was another classic example of showmance. I wish some rich people had more respect for the meaning of marriage rather than treating it like an on/off switch or/and a potential business venture.

by creativesaver, 4 months ago

You are so right CS ... 'On/off switch and potential business failure' describes it to a T! What seems to have been lost in today's society is the value of marriage in simply wanting to be together and for nothing else. Such sentiments, or rather lack of them, are simply amplified a hundred fold in celebrity marriages as interdependency appears to be non existent. You therefore have to admire celebrity marriages that survive through thick and then. The sickening things about these style of marriages is that money is made in its millions on the back of glitzy, showy weddings that feed to media but in so many cases are just another acting role, to cease at a later date!

by Snoopy48, 4 months ago

Isn't it a real shame that marriage is viewed in this way nowadays - here today gone tomorrow. I hope in the future that more people will get married and form a partnership like our parents and ourselves have done.

Two of my children - 35 and 36 are unmarried. One has been with her partner for almost 17 years and the other at least 5 years but no sign of weddings. I don't mention it as it's none of my business. All I'm worried is that they will suddenly decide to marry and how I'm going to help pay towards the costs as with one being a girl I'll expect to pay a good portion. I was looking at the cost of a wedding the other day and unless you can go it "on the cheap" it sounds like an enormous amount for a few hours. If they had got married after they were engaged awhile it would have cost far less. Having said that I would, if it is their wish, be very happy to see them wed.

I know there will be a reaction to this but that's what discussions are all about.

by Sabre, 4 months ago

You are lovely Sabre, but at their age I'm sure you wouldn't be expected to finance the wedding, even if you'd like to contribute :)

by Jazzj, 4 months ago

Well, all I can say is that I didn't realise that some of you appear to know these 'celebrities' so well personally that you can pass judgement on exactly what the problems within their marriages are, and why they have decided to end their marriages. If you prick them, do they not bleed...

by fruitcake, 4 months ago

I just don't understand how people can leave their children for another person..It really mystifies me

by rosetta, 1 month ago

Me neither, could never leave my children.

by Jazzj, 1 month ago

Leave them - i have been trying for 25 years to give them away !!!

by steve_ben2004, 1 month ago

I'm hoping they'll have left home by the time they're 25!

by Jazzj, 1 month ago

So did I so I ended up having to change locks

by steve_ben2004, 1 month ago

LOL, steve!

by Feline123, 1 month ago

Thanks Steve, something for me to look forward to then!!

by Jazzj, 1 month ago

I felt the same, steve, but I still missed them when they left!

by fruitcake, 1 month ago

Only need one of mine to go out for a while and the whole dynamic of the house changes, so quiet when one of them not here, God knows what it'll be like when they've all gone!

by Jazzj, 1 month ago

Well, I expected to find it easy, Jazz, as both of mine had been to boarding school and only came home in the holidays, for exeats they chose to stay with their friends, but I still really missed them after they left home for good. I missed having a house full of strapping lovely lads eating their way through the contents of the freezer, and practicing their chat up lines on me, and the girls all giggling and getting dolled up for their nights out! I missed all the loud music and daft things they got up to. House felt like a morgue once they'd left!

by fruitcake, 1 month ago

Do you know steve I thought you were only in your twenties. I think it must be your photo makes you look young.

by Sabre, 1 month ago

Avatar in disguise?... Lol!

by serena1, 1 month ago

My son has just been for his tea which was his favourite. It was all ready when he rang to say he had a customer and would be late. By the time he got here it was 7.15 p.m. and by the time he went it was 8.20 p.m. but what a lovely hour spent laughing and giggling at what's been going on in his life. I've missed him since the moment he left home and when he'd gone tonight I still felt that big void but so happy he is doing well and has got a nice partner. What more could you wish for them.

by Sabre, 1 month ago

Oh, Sabre, how I envy you being able to sit down with your son and have a chat! My son has lived abroad for years now, and I never get that opportunity, phone calls and internet chats aren't quite the same.

by fruitcake, 1 month ago

My mum says she never stops missing any of us Sabre, but there's never any recriminations about not seeing her often enough, we always have such a laugh

by Jazzj, 1 month ago

So here is the deal. You sign a deal with 'Hello' or 'OK' Magazine to give them exclusive rights to the photographs for your wedding for a few hundred grand - oh and they will also pick up the tab for the wedding.

Stay married for a weeks and then get a 'celeb' divorce and get Max Clifford to handle the publicity for you as you sell your sob story to The Sun. It ain't rocket science

Call me a cynic or what

by steve_ben2004, 1 month ago

Your'e an old cynic, steve!

by Feline123, 1 month ago

Thhank you for your touching faith in me Feline

by steve_ben2004, 1 month ago

You can always rely on me, steve!

by Feline123, 1 month ago

Having, re-visited this topic, I have no idea why 'some people' get married. I just know why I did!

by Feline123, 1 month ago

And that's all that matters Feline :) I do know I never will again.

by Jazzj, 1 month ago

Lol, Feline!!!!

by serena1, 1 month ago

I wouldn't get married again either, Jazz, I love the freedom too much!

by fruitcake, 1 month ago

I say that too Fruity but folk say "never say never" is the reply I get! Lol!

by serena1, 1 month ago

Definitely never for me, Serena, relationships are fine...just not the marriage thing!

by fruitcake, 1 month ago

In total agreement with you Fruits! :-)

by serena1, 1 month ago

At the moment I couldn't even begin to contemplate another relationship let alone marriage!!

by Jazzj, 1 month ago

Everyone feels like that, Jazz, but 99% of us move on in time. Also, I've noticed that those who say it the most are the ones who do the opposite. I'm sure some of the other members on here will back me up on that! :-)

by fruitcake, 1 month ago

Really?? Don't hold your breath Fruits :)

by Jazzj, 1 month ago

Lol, Jazz! Time will tell! :-)

by fruitcake, 1 month ago

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